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1 August 10

30 life lessons handed down from “It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia”

  1. Salt, shot, lime.
  2. It’s an insult to bring someone a diet soda.
  3. Poppers improve aim.
  4. If you want it to look like a bicep, it needs more veins.
  5. Drinking Chardonnay is faggy.
  6. When he says his “sister”, he means “his sister”.
  7. Asians love gambling.
  8. There is no Pepe Silvia.
  9. You don’t eat someone just because they don’t have heroin in their ass.
  10. There is a strange connection between drinking a lot of beer, huffing glue and eating cat-food that makes you feel sick and go to bed.
  11. It’s okay to let an alcoholic drink as long as you’re trying to play Sex & The City
  12. Never wear black and yellow. You will look a bumblebee, bitch.
  13. Abortion rallies are a good place to pick up women.
  15. Describing an episode of Law & Order is not a story.
  16. Every great group in history has followed a basic dynamic: the brains, the looks, the muscle, the wildcard and the useless chick.
  17. Gasoline is a thousand time more expensive than electricity.
  18. Hospital gowns really let your ass breathe.
  19. Banging a tranny = serial killing.
  20. Instead of working out, just take pills.
  21. 80’s music is the best music for spin classes.
  22. You don’t write a musical without a reason.
  23. If you break into someone’s house, you need to blast death metal.
  24. It’s all about nips and hips, otherwise no one will eat.
  25. Human meat tastes good.
  26. Poop is funny.
  27. Nobody parties like a jockey.
  28. Under every stadium is a tunnel.
  29. Bitch, you speak when spoken to now.
  30. Charlie is the toughest guy you know.

(Submitted by theaverageparadise)

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Themed by Hunson. Originally by Josh